[Sunday - 07/6/2008 - 7:00pm] growtrees I'm the black sheep of the family or should I say white sheep....

[Sunday - 07/6/2008 - 3:58pm] rolodex Back to Orlando already. Honestly, part of me doesn't want to leave, at least not yet. I haven't seen half of the people I wanted to see. I haven't spent as much time with certain people as I wanted to. I haven't done anything I wanted to do, besides go to Jaxon's. Oh well, I'll be back again, for longer, soon enough... "You know it kills me to see such a pretty girl so tired. You've got your mother's cheekbones and your father's crooked smile. Forget all those places that you've never really been and all those situations you somehow found yourself in. Let your body sink into me, like your favorite memory, like a line of poetry, or a fucking fit of honesty. I'll do my best to keep you, keep you sleepy as the South, with my old watch on your wrist and my thumbs inside your mouth. Suck on my fingertips until you kill all my prints, so your boyfriend has no clue of how much I've been touching you."

[Sunday - 07/6/2008 - 7:55am] verbsnouns i want a job in a library.

"i wanted them to just physically assault him." [Saturday - 07/5/2008 - 11:54pm] paperback

there lived a little girl who loved to bake [Saturday - 07/5/2008 - 9:29pm] xxparabola [ mood | calm ] [ music | fall out boy, you know it. ] ( here's a bunch of shit. )

[Saturday - 07/5/2008 - 8:03pm] reverberates [ music | tv on the radio - wolf like me ] my friend thinks i am bitter. i say i am down to earth. i need to find a place where i can buy a new usb cable to my zune. i have no idea why i gave my brother my ipod and bought a zune. what was i thinking? he doesn't even take care of the ipod like a person should. it's an expensive device. and i gave it away. i am probably bipolar. one day i love something and then i think about it constantly and wonder whether i really like it at all and end up not caring about it anymore. and then the next day i want it back and really like it. i don't understand that about myself and wonder if it's normal to feel that way. either way i need to tighten my mind up and stop acting pessimistic. optimism is the way to go. God knows. oh. and i made a new journal but livejournal has decided that basic accounts are not an option for new users. so i am stuck.

[Saturday - 07/5/2008 - 10:52am] verbsnouns i have decided to try my best to stop labelling myself and others. it's a natural tendency of humans due to their wanting to be near those who have common interests, but who cares if i'm a vegan bike kid? if the fact that i am vegan and like bikes means anything to someone, whatever. that's their decision to base their judgment of me on that. there's more to it than that; there's more to me than that. labels are easy, getting to actually know someone is hard. i want to do the latter and stop being so lazy about the people i surround myself with. so from now on, i'm gonna try to be just dana. i'm sorry for all the dumb philosophical posts lately, but it's my goddamn livejournal.

[Friday - 07/4/2008 - 7:11pm] reverberates i really want to make another journal and as soon as i do i'll add people or something like that

you'll be coming clean tonight [Friday - 07/4/2008 - 6:06pm] xxparabola [ mood | okay ] [ music | rasputina ] I should be the star of VH1s best week ever. Best 2-3 weeks ever, maybe, since that's the last time I've created an update. My entire birthday weekend was phenomenal. I went out with my mom and ate some amazing eel down at Nobu's. The Thursday festivity at Atomic was a huge bust, so I just went home and invited my underage friends (Meredith, Colin, Cody, Clarissa) who couldn't make it anyway over for some delicious cake and "Apocalypto" screening. Did you see that fucking cake? That thing took 2 cake mixes, was 3 layers, and was probably twice the size of my head. Clarissa loves me. That Friday I met up with Kevin, Josh, Whitney, Nick Perkowski, Tony, Brian and Lyn for the super fabulous 999 Eyes Freakshow at Cicero's, which was probably the best show I've seen all year. Everyone got super drunk and crazy and acted a fool and the craziness carried on loooong after we'd left Ciceros. It was probably the most fun night I've had in the last year, all the way up until I finally lost consciousness in the wee hours of the morning. I splurged on some new makeup brushes and foundation with the MAC card I got, and went to ANOTHER somewhat-birthday party at Meredith's house. I got a little tipsy and was extremely mean to Rick Petty (Meredith tried to un-invite him for me but I said whatev) including throwing popcorn at him and telling him I wished the popcorns were rocks. Otherwise it was super fun and I enjoyed myself immensely. I spent the next week in Nashville doing various photoshoots and hanging out, although I got to hang out substancially less than I had wanted to. Cody got arrested, because he's an underage insubordinate hardass aka gay and mixed in the south. I shot some great foot/smoking/shower fetish polaroids with Collin Rae (who by the way, is supremely wonderful and also got my signature TATTOOED on his hand), some kitsch little poses with EJ holmes, and some fun poolside nudes/light bondage with John Donegan, who is also wonderful. He wants me back in Nashville rather soon to do a full-on dungeon set for Hustler Taboo (not to get too ahead of myself - it has to be accepted/approved by the editor first, but shit you gotta try!). It'll be a hell of a lot more I guess you could say "pornographic" due to the nature of the publication, but I've long ago accepted the fact one of my main purposes in life is to be erotic and make sexual art. Dive right in! On that note, nipple clamps hurt. I'm still waiting for most of the photos from the trip to get back to me, but I have a few back from EJ and one or two back from John already. Also shot some more fine art nudes with Stan Trampe upon return home, as well as another small outdoor shoot. Overall I've been doing okay to great. Hung out with my family for my grandma's 80th birthday, went to the White Flag underwear party, hanging out at my local bar with my friends, went to Pridefest, margarita nights, walking my dog and hanging out with her, and FINALLY catching up on some much needed rest. I finally kissed a boy I like and I have a feeling it's only the beginning of something.... Although I am extremely hesitant and reluctant... the gemini is FIGHTING with me on this one... hopefully he'll understand, because he's amazing like that. I'm FINALLY getting my chest piece finished on Monday, holy SHIT now 2 years after I had the first session it will now be complete. I think I'm adding on two more stars on each side, which may or may not happen on Monday, but that won't count as unfinished if it doesn't happen since the extra stars were not a part of the original design. Schwagstock is next weekend!! I'm stoked. I was originally going to pay my way in and play all weekend instead of work (like I have EVERY time I've been down there...), but Chris needs me to help out with some things and if she needs my help I don't mind doing her a favor and also saving myself some money at the same time, ha. I may be staying in St. Louis longer than I had hoped for - a year, at the very most. I think an important thing one needs to learn in life is to never make plans - because life is always going to fuck them up anyway. Go with the flow, basically. Last night Clarissa, Bryan and I fired up the grill and made wonderful tequila burgers and corn and macaroni at about midnight. Midnight snack, I always say. Oh, there was beer too. Dead guy and Blue moon, both in my top ten. Today, not so sure - I don't even know if anything's going on tonight but I will try my best to make SOMETHING happen, as I love watching shiny bright colors explode in the sky, and beer drinking. I love beer, too. Beer and colorful explosives, I don't need much more.   more later... must walk dog...

[Friday - 07/4/2008 - 2:42pm] bedsidesaucers To anyone who had input on the color combos in this post, does it look better now? I guess a few people saw a blinding blue background behind the text, and I think maybe I fixed it now? If not, then shit.

[Friday - 07/4/2008 - 7:50am] verbsnouns yesterday at work i was told by an argentinian and a german, "have a good fourth." maybe they don't know all the bad things that are happening in america, or maybe i'm missing something.

[Thursday - 07/3/2008 - 11:11pm] growtrees God I adore her voice

[Thursday - 07/3/2008 - 3:06pm] growtrees The Drawers - Old Man The Drawers - Sonar* Two songs by the band who's using this photo for their next cd cover. Question: I'm looking for a new lens for my 20D. I currently own a 50mm (1.8) and some cheap kit lens that came with my Canon K2. I'm now looking for a good "walk-around" lens. I love my 50mm but it's fixed and I need a lens with decent zoom capabilities. I'd prefer to stay in the $350 and under price range. Help!?

hell yes [Thursday - 07/3/2008 - 1:09pm] bedsidesaucers [ mood | excited ] I'm moving in exactly one month. I talked to Jason (my landlord/my friend Jen's older brother) a few days ago, and it is even better than I thought. I figured we were going to have to share the laundry room, but I get my own :) I think there may even be a private entrance. Oh. Yes. The area I'm moving to even has a page on Wikipedia!

:) [Thursday - 07/3/2008 - 10:29am] reverberates Dorothy doesn't have cancer!!!! Hooray Thank God. I prayed for days The lesion was left over from something else

? [Wednesday - 07/2/2008 - 8:58pm] bedsidesaucers which combination do you prefer? combo #1. combo #2. combo #3.

[Wednesday - 07/2/2008 - 12:23am] marrymedraco [ mood | sleepy ] hi. so a lot has happened since i wrote my last journal. alex and i broke up. i'm not used to it. i'm not sure how long it will take me until i am. i'm not doing so good. and basically i have been doing like nothing productive lately except studying. i'm pretty sure that i'm addicted to shopping too. not that i consider that something productive but it does make me feel better. this weekend is the fourth of july and erin and greg and i are going to indiana which i'm excited about. i haven't been up there since spring break. i need to sleep more. i have not been doing that much lately. i love my laptop. just saying. know what makes me mad? when firefox tells me that words are spelled wrong when really i just didn't capitalize them. accounting is amazing. marketing hates me. i should be a professional card maker because i love to make cards (if you've ever gotten one, you know they rock) and i got to make some at work for our office to be the birthday cards that we send out to our employees and they're pretty sweet. and basically i love publisher. not gonna lie. i hadn't used it before but i wish i had it on this computer so i could use it all the time for all sorts of things. know what i don't like? not making lots of money. i wish i had incentive to continue this crazy unfun world i am in when i'm at work or in class. i know what ppl say about how this will all be worth it someday and that i'll need this for the things i want in life. but i feel like i'm capable of doing that stuff now. i'm a fast learner and i like hands on learning. really. i'm just having trouble seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. on a better note.. we got a huge shipment of office supplies in from office max today at work and that basically made my entire week. no joke. and i've been doing a lot of cleaning and stuff lately and i enjoy that. know what i don't like? not having AIS reports to do. i love AIS reports. for those of you wondering i think that AIS stands for Administrative information system. i could get on the siue website right now and figure it out but i would rather type. wow. i'm that lazy. i'm laying in bed with my laptop on my lap and my back up against a hello kitty wedge pillow and i still don't feel like moving my wrists from the position they are in on my keyboard to the little touch pad. ha ha ha oh life. i plucked my eyebrows today. got my nails filled yesterday. have been trying to eat better. not seeing much progress but i'm hoping these things take time. and i bought new makeup today with jessy at target that i'm going to try out tomorrow and we'll see how that works out. and hopefully this weekend in indiana i'll be able to get my hair highlighted. i'm trying. so my camera is ruined i think. it will only turn on if i have it plugged into the wall and they stopped making the kind of batteries that it needs. so that blows. i think my birthday list will be new camera, bookcase, money, clothes, movies, and palm pilot cellular. that sounds good. i guess thats it for now. i feel better. maybe i just needed to type. its kind of therapeutic for me. thats right, i spelled it correctly. so i guess sometimes the spell check on firefox works for me. </3

ayfea [Tuesday - 07/1/2008 - 10:07pm] cartet [ music | john mayer ] the number one reason why i miss my mom: I'M HUNGRY!!! (reason .5 why i miss her is because she's my mom.) there is nothing to eat here but ramen noodles, cereal, cookies and nasty takeout leftovers. i need some delicious home cooked meals that actually makes me full. i suppose things would be a lot different if my mom left us some money for me to go grocery shopping: eventually i need to learn how to cook for people. i've had a mean sore throat and cough since wednesday. i went to the aquarium and threw up all over a row of parking lot, but i did see a lot of neat fish.

[Tuesday - 07/1/2008 - 7:06pm] verbsnouns by the way i also have this: http://verbsnouns.tumblr.com

[Tuesday - 07/1/2008 - 11:14am] verbsnouns i think my stomach is being rejected by my body. remember how i said i wasn't hungry lately? well i've still been eating, cos, like, you have to do that to stay alive and shit, but i always feel sick afterwards. today it reached a climax and i threw up foam. FOAM? wtf. i have a doctor's appointment but i'm sort of scared as to what weird things are going on. i've been having a lot of problems with my stomach this year.

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